Your People Skills:

Effective Listening

Listening to Emotions

Understanding Emotional Reactions and Attitudes

By: Vadim Kotelnikov

Founder, Ten3 BUSINESS e-COACH – Your 360 Achievement Catalyst, 1000ventures.com, 1000advices.com, and Success360.com

  

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Listen To What Is Not Said

There is a real distinction between merely hearing the words and really listening for the message. When you listen effectively you understand what the person is thinking and/or feeling from the other person’s own perspective. It is as if you were standing in the other person’s shoes, seeing through his/her eyes and listening through the person's ears. Your own viewpoint may be different and you may not necessarily agree with the person, but as you listen, you understand from the other's perspective. To listen effectively, you must be actively involved in the communication process, and not just listening passively.1

Listen to how something is said. We frequently concentrate so hard on what is said that we miss the importance of the emotional reactions and attitudes related to what is said. Attitudes, and emotional reactions may be more important.

The Tao of Effective Listening

Be empathic and nonjudgmental. You can be accepting and respectful of the person and their feelings and beliefs without invalidating or giving up your own position, or without agreeing with the accuracy and validity of their view.

Listen to yourself. Be aware of your own emotions. Your feelings of sadness, anger, anxiety, fear or happiness are often the first clue that your prospect is communicating an important emotional message. Avoid the trap of quickly acting on your emotions. For example, if you find yourself feeling angry, do not tell your prospect you are angry; instead use your feeling of anger as a cue to find out more about what he or she is saying.

Humorous Business Plan: Great Communicator

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Rule #10: Be Aware. We must be aware of the speaker, aware of verbal and non-verbal cues, and aware of our own listening strengths and challenges... More

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Treat your prospective customer as a player who wants to achieve extraordinary results. You are to help the player win.

Listen to words, body language and emotions to understand the player's both conscious and unconscious needs.... More

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Emotional energy is what runs the world. Everyone is primarily emotional. Everything that people do, or refrain from doing, is triggered by their deeper emotions.

"Emotional Intelligence" refers to your capacity and skills to recognize your own feelings and those of others, for motivating yourself, and for managing emotions well in yourself and in your relationships... More

 

 


 

Bibliography:

  1. "Tips on Effective Listening,"  Dr. Larry Alan Nadig

  2. Rule#1: Stop Talking!: A Guide to Listening, Linda Eve Diamond

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