Vadim Kotelnikov  

Negotiation DOs and DON'Ts

Achieve desired results amicably








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Same Reality, Different Perceptions

4 NLP Perceptual Positions

People Skills 360

Yin-Yang of Influencing People

Yin-Yang of Communication

Understand Cultural Differences

Getting To Yes





Think Win-Win

Great negotiators build strong, durable, win-win relationships because they have an obligation to reach a wise agreement that would help their counterparts in negotiations come out winners.



Win-Win Negotiations

Win-Win Mindset




Set the Right Tone

Use all your soft skills.

Be careful what you say at the beginning and how you say it. Set a friendly tone. If you negotiate with a stranger, take time to establish rapport and develop relationship before the negotiation begin.

  Soft Skills Pyramid Soft Skills Pyramid Soft Skills Breakthrough Soft Skills Change Leader Nice Person Champion Advanced Soft Skills Basic Soft Skills Soft Skills Pyramid - basic, advanced, breakthrough



Find ways to meet them informally or arrive early to chat before the negotiation is scheduled to start. The more quickly you can establish rapport with the counterpart, the easier the negotiation is likely to become. When you are through negotiating, always congratulate the other side. Say something like “You were brilliant,” to make them feel that they won in the negotiations.


Soft Skills

Be Charismatic

Understand EGA of Your Counterparts

Present Impactfully

Negotiation Tips







Agree First, Then Turn Around

Avoid confrontational negotiations. If your counterpart takes a position with which you totally disagree, don’t argue. It may come across as, “I’m right and you’re wrong.” Arguing always puts your opponent in a defending position, makes him or her to argue back, and intensifies his or her desire to win the contest of rightness and will. So, agree first, that turn it around.

Roger Dowson, the author of Secrets of Power Negotiating, advises to use the Feel, Felt, Found (3F) formula to diffuse the competitive spirit. For instance, if you are selling something, and your prospective buyer says, “Your price is way too high,” don’t argue. Say instead, “I understand exactly how you feel about that. Many other people have felt exactly the same way as you do when they first hear the price. When they take a closer look at what we offer, however, they have always found that we offer the best value in the marketplace.”


Yin-Yang of Negotiation

Principled Negotiation

Wise Agreement

Conduct During Negotiation

Separate the People from the Problem

How To Solve People Problems

Ask Learning SWOT Questions






Negotiation as a Joint-Problem-Solving Exercise

 "Negotiation in the classic diplomatic sense assumes parties more anxious to agree than to disagree." ~ Dean Acheson

There are profound differences between adversarial position-focused bargaining and alternative methods of principled or joint- problem-solving negotiation. Positional bargaining often impedes negotiations, destroys relationships and produces unwise agreements. The more attention is paid to positions, the less attention is devoted to meeting the underlying concerns of the parties.

Problem Solving Strategies: 4 Levels

Creative Problem Solving

Turn Problems To Opportunities

The principled negotiation strategy developed by the leaders of the Harvard Negotiation Project1 advocates a different approach. Participants should act not as adversaries, but as partners trying to solve a problem jointly.

By separating the people from the problem, they aim to reach a wise agreement efficiently and amicably.