Developing Yourself:

People Skills

Building Great Relationships

The Art, Science, and Practice

Vadim Kotelnikov personal logo Vadim Kotelnikov

Founder, Ten3 Business e-Coach – Happiness, Achievement,  Inspiration and Innovation unlimited!

  

"The most important single ingredient in the formula of success is knowing how to get along with people." ~ Theodore Roosevelt

 

  

Pearls of Wisdom

East

"Recompense injury with justice, and recompense kindness with kindness."

– Confucius

"Hatreds never cease by hatreds in this world. By love alone they cease."

– Buddha

"Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other."

– Dalai Lama

West

"If you can be interested in other people you can own the world."

– Jay Abraham

"The worm lures the fish, not the fisherman and his tackle."

– Angler's maxim

"To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved."

– George MacDonald

A Short Course in Human Relations

By an unknown author

The six most important words:

"I admit I made a mistake."

The five most important words:

"You did a good job."

The four most important words:

"What is your opinion?"

The three most important words:

"If you please."

The two most important words:

"Thank you."

The one most important word:

"We"

The least important word:

"I"

NLP Technology of Achievement

Exploring Relationships

Don't forget that your and your prospect's map of the reality is not the same – the meaning of the same thing is different for different people

  1. Explore what you think about the relationship. Label both your own and the other person's behavior.  Change the state – shake off all bad feelings.

  2. Explore the relationship from the other person's point of view. Imagine how they experience your behavior. What sort of label would they put on it? How do they feel? Shake off that emotional state before continuing.

  3. Go outside the relationship, become a detached observer – imagine a stage and see both of you on stage. See that other person doing what they do, and see yourself responding to them.

  4. Shift your question from 'How can I change that person's behavior?' to 'How am I reinforcing or triggering that person's behavior?' Explore how else you could respond to him or her... More

I've Learned...

By: Andy Rooney

I've learned....
That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

I've learned....
That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand...
More

Confucius about Relationships

Do not impose on others what you yourself do not desire.

Forget injuries, never forget kindnesses.

When anger rises, think of the consequences... More

10 Steps To Resolving Inner and Outer Conflict

  • Practice Non-Violence (physical, mental and verbal) within yourself and your own life.

  • Assume an Attitude of Non-Possessiveness – (physical and emotional) avoiding over accumulation of possessions that causes us to protect and defend... More

Health Benefits of Friendship2

People with strong social networks are shown to:

  • Boost their chances of surviving life-threatening illness.

  • Have stronger, more resilient immune systems.

  • Improve their mental health.

  • Live longer than people without social support.

 

Customer Loyalty

The Things that Customers Want

Customers will usually come back if:

  • Your treat customers as individuals... More

NLP Technology of Achievement

3 Rules for Dealing with Rude and Unfair Clients

  • To salvage the relationship, search for a solution in cooperation with your client; re-focus his or her attention from the problem to the solution – ask him or her, what is it you can do to resolve the conflict... More

 Jokes  

25 Rules for Women

Humorous Tips from Men:

  • If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

  • We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you... More

Humorous Business Plan

Success in Love

Brief History: "Men always want to be a woman's first love – women like to be a man's last romance." – Oscar Wilde...

Milestones completed and future plans: "Man begins by loving love and ends by loving a woman. Woman begins by loving a man and ends by loving love." – Remy De Gourmount...

Growth Strategy: "If men knew all that women think, they'd be twenty times more daring." – Alphonse Karr... More

12 Tips for Global Business Travelers

 

Building Relationships – the Key to Your Personal Success

Successful people have the ability to develop relationships that last.

Building relationship requires the building of trust.

Your People Skills 360

Social Evolution: from Love to 'Like'

Your Most Important Relationship

Your relationship with yourself is your closest and most important relationship. What kind of relationship with yourself have you chosen – a judging, a coaching, a fearful, or a loving one? "Ask yourself in meditation what kind of friendship you want to nurture with your own self – do you want an inner friend who constantly judges you and denies you love, or do you want an inner friend who accepts you just as you are?" advises John Selby.

Jesus on Love

"Love your neighbor, but who is your neighbor. Your neighbor is the one who is sent to you from the Divine. Your neighbor can be one who is a total stranger to you from afar. Your neighbor can be someone living close to you. But what is true is that your neighbor is one of the Light who needs your support as much as you need his."... More

All-Inclusive Love

Balancing Giving and Receiving

Your life can only be in balance when giving and receiving are in balance. Every interpersonal relationship is built on this fact of life. He who always gives acts against this principle just as much as he who only takes. This basic truth is valid without exception everywhere where people deal with people... More

Yin and Yang of Communication

People Skills: 8 Humorous Quotes

Stray Birds

By: Rabindranath Tagore

"Let this be my last word, but I trust in thy love."... More

Love Quotes

"In love, one and one are one." – Jean-Paul Sartre... More 

Humorous Quotes: Relationships & Love

"I drink to make other people interesting." – George Jean Nathan.

"When you are ill make haste to forgive your enemies, for you may recover." – Ambrose Bierce... More

Move From HOW Are You To WHO Are You

6 Creative Questions To Answer

By: Scott Ginsberg

There comes a time in every conversation with someone you’ve just met when you must cross the chasm between “HOW are you?” and “WHO are you?” A helpful technique for doing so is by asking creative, open ended questions. These questions function as front porches, inasmuch as their ability to build rapport, spark creativity and invite people to share their experiences and preferences. What’s more, they show an interest in people’s opinions and insights... More

Friendship

There is solid scientific evidence that friendship can extend life. Several hundreds of studies attest to the health benefits of friendship. People with plentiful social support have stronger immune systems and are less likely to suffer from depression, anxiety and other types of mental illness. Having friends mitigates the physiological consequences of stress.

 Case in Point  Health Benefits of Friendship

In a Yale University study of 194 heart attack patients, those who reported emotional support were three times more likely to be alive six months after their attack than subjects who had no support.

In a study at Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburg, researchers rounded up 276 volunteers, dripped cold viruses into their noses, and then quarantined them for five days. Subjects who had a wide range of friends and acquaintances had one-fourth the chance of catching a cold as those whose social networks were minimal.

Mental Fengshui: 21 Rules

Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship... More

14 Ways To Nourish Conflict

If you love conflict in your life, don't listen to anyone. Especially if someone is already hot under the collar, any sign of not listening will turn up the heat... More

Same Reality, Different Perceptions

People Skills: 8 Humorous Quotes

10 Rules of Effective Listening

By: Linda Eve Diamond

Listening broadens us, lays the groundwork for peace, elevates the quality of our relationships, and opens the way to success. If nothing else, when you listen, you'll find you are the most popular person in the room... More

Building Relationships – Your Key Business Skills

A relationship is two people eliciting responses from each other. If you want a change in response, then you must change your own actions.

As a business professional, you should ask yourself: "What business am I in?". The answer is quite simple: if your business has anything to do with people - and ALL businesses do - you are in the business of building relationships. "Some people think that if they sell things, they are in the business of selling. They aren't. They are in the business of building relationships – because that's how you sell things. Those in management are also in the business of building relationships, because that's how you get things done."1... More

4 NLP Perceptual Positions

5 Essential Strategies for Managing Up

There are five laws that you absolutely must follow if you have any hope of creating, maintaining, and managing any productive relationship with your boss... More

6 Attributes of a Successful CEO

  1. Maintaining Key Relationships. To have a long-term view you need to have strong political ties, good shareholder relations and the skills and knowledge to allow people to understand and buy into the long-term view. A successful relationship with the board of directors is of particular importance... More

Empathy

Empathy is valued currency. It allows us to create bonds of trust, it gives us insights into what others may be feeling or thinking; it helps us understand how or why others are reacting to situations, it sharpens our “people acumen” and informs our decisions. Empathy is also particularly critical to leadership development in this age of young, independent, highly marketable and mobile workers... More

Relationship Marketing

In today's customer-driven economy, corporations must move from product-based campaign marketing to a customer-based relationship approach. Customer relationship management is the management of customer communication over a relationship continuum. It includes relationship strategy and multi-channel relationship programs that produce both business value and customer experiences on a scale not seen in traditional marketing... More

Synergistic Selling; 3 Pillars

Become an Irresistible Sales Communicator

Synergistic communications takes the sales process beyond building relationships to building partnership. The goal is to create a "we" space – where differences are valued and used as stepping stones to create true win-win outcome... More

10 Strategic Tips on How To Achieve High Visibility In Your Target Market

By J. Glenn Ebersole, Jr.

Gaining high visibility and a positive, trusted position will ultimately enable you to build quality relationships with more people in your niche markets and result in an increased number of prospects. The people who achieve this high visibility exhibit certain characteristics and behaviors. Your Strategic Thinking Business Coach offers five (5) DO's and five (5) DONT'S to make up the following ten (10) strategic tips on how to achieve high visibility in your target market... More

 

 

 

 

 

References:

  1. "NLP - the New Technology of Achievement", Steve Andreas and Charles Faulkner

  2. "Friends - the Secret to a Longer Life", Katherine Griffin

  3. "Seven Masters, One Path", John Selby

  4. "The Five Minds of a Manager," J.Gosling and H.Mintzberg

  5. "The Most Important Gifts Of All," Pauline Wallin

Free Micro-course

10 slides

Why and How To Listen

 

Yahoo! Personals

Your People Skills

Life

Love

Happiness 360: the Three Loves

Love Quotes

Osho About Love As a Sacred Experience

People Skills

Building Relationships

How To Be Funny and Make People Laugh

10 Rules of Effective Networking

The Tao of Communication

Confucius about Communication

Effective Listening

Establishing Rapport

Building Trust

Humorous Business Plans

Success in Love

Creating, Winning, and Retaining Customers

Relationship Marketing

Selling by Listening

Jokes and Humorous Quotes

Relationships, Love

Communication: Listening, Speaking