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Knowing Yourself and Others Recognizing Your Own and Other People's Needs, Capabilities, Thinking and Communication Styles |
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By Vadim Kotelnikov, Founder, Ten3 BUSINESS e-COACH, 1000ventures.com
"Intelligent people know others. Enlightened people know themselves." – Lau Tzu
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." – Oliver Wendell Holmes
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Recognizing Beliefs and Values Beliefs are the assumptions we make about ourselves, about others in the world and about how we expect things to be. "These assumptions determine the way we behave and shape our decision-making process. They are often based on emotions rather than facts. We tend to notice 'facts' that reinforce our beliefs."7... More Discovering Yourself "The creative is the place where no one else has ever been. You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you'll discover will be wonderful. What you'll discover will be yourself." – Alan Alda The Way Our Mind Works The language of brain are pictures, sounds, feelings, tastes and smells, i.e. inputs from your senses. Your brain cannot work with negative information, i.e. inputs you haven't experienced. It can work only with positive information, i.e. "information from the experiences of your five senses, which it then manipulates in the emotional blender we call the imagination."8... More NLP Technology of Achievement: Accessing Cues In Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), the clues and cues that help you recognize your own and other people's preferred thinking and communication styles are called "accessing cues" because they help you access the way someone is processing whatever is happening around them. Self-Awareness – the First Step to Influencing Others By knowing yourself then only can you know other people and influence and share your experiences with them. Great leaders, coaches and communicators don't focus extremely on their followers, coachees and audience. They have a high degree of self-awareness. We all have basic skills to lead, coach, or communicate; unfortunately, most of us have a few psychological blocks when it comes to applying those skills well and consistently. Knowing yourself will help you overcome your own blocks. Meditation is an effective way to understand the world and yourself. By exploring the here-and-now of yourselves you can explore the world. Unless you investigate the world within you can never know reality – you will only know your beliefs about it, or your intellectual conceptions of it. By observing yourselves, however, you can come to know reality directly and can learn to deal with it in a positive, creative way.9 Understanding Preferred Styles
There are many models for understanding and characterizing
the styles of interaction different people prefer to employ.
Reading People – Listen Intently to the Specific Words People Use10 Ask a simple open-ended question. Then, be quiet and make note of the exact words the other person uses. When a person answers an open-ended question, he stops focusing outward and goes inside his mind. At that instant, he becomes relatively unaware of the words he uses. Those words point back in time to meaningful memories and emotional experiences. Just listen. Most people tell you more about themselves than they think. Add those words to the facial expressions and body language. What you get is the beginning of an in-depth psychological profile. Once you get that, you will get a much better understanding of how to build rapport and trust; how to connect to that person; what to promise, and how to fulfill those promises. 12 Tips for Global Travelers
Using the Enneagram The purpose of the Enneagram is self-knowledge that can be used to further your spiritual growth, and your understanding and compassion of others. This system can be applied for analyzing and influencing unconscious strategies and behavior of not only people but also organizations, cultures, and countries... More
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